Normally I dismiss things and people that are needy. I tend to approach those emotional posts that should be in a diary and not on the internet with a get-over-yourself attitude. Since I look at things this way, it bothers me that I like the song Stay With Me by Sam Smith. The lyrics tell a story of someone who settles for cheap imitations of love and clings to very shallow things, believing that’s as deep as life gets. Something about this song got me to actually listen and not dismiss it for what I would normally consider whining. Maybe something in my humanity resonates with the line; “I don’t want you to leave, could you hold my hand?” Or maybe I was just shocked to hear a man instead of a woman sing; “Oh, won’t you stay with me? ‘Cause you’re all I need.”
Whatever the reason, I believe the song. I think it’s different in a good way that a male artist would choose a vulnerable ballad like this because it speaks to the human condition.
The second verse says: “Why am I so emotional? No it’s not a good look, gain some self –control.” If you’re like me, and the singer Sam Smith-or whoever actually wrote the song-you give yourself a hard time for feeling whatever it is you feel. You might think it’s stupid to cry, or that saying sorry is a sign of weakness. As a writer I come from a creative people, I feel like I’m at my best when I’m creating something. Other creative people know that inspiration is lifeblood for creating, and that painful inspiration is both the best and the worst to work with. I don’t know about you but I refuse to go through pain without purpose. I refuse to go through suffering without improving my survivor skills. I think life is a where beautiful disasters happen and I don’t think it’s ever just one or the other.
Although emotions are not my favorite they exist for a reason, just as everything else. I no longer believe it’s weak to feel but that it’s strong to admit you do. It’s risky to feel because sometimes it hurts and no one wants to be hurt but living with a hollow heart is not living, breathing without feeling is merely existing.
We’re human, we feel, when we get cut we bleed and that’s okay. It is perfectly okay to not be okay. People feel lonely and needy and want to sing the Stay with Me chorus; “This ain’t love it’s clear to see but, darling, stay will me.” Soon enough though, for the best to come a new song has to be sung. Even it’s just a few steps in the direction of a silver lining with something like Mumford and Sons-The Cave. “And I will hold on hope. And I won’t let you choke on the noose around your neck.”
Poet Shayne Koyczan said; “pain is part of the human condition and that alone makes you a legion.” So yes, there will be hurt but healing will follow. Pain will be felt but none of us ever truly suffer alone. To add to this already very lyrical article, the song Let Go says “there’s beauty in the breakdown.” Heartbreaks are so bad that they’re good. They hurt us, and humble us, and teach us. If we go about it right, if we value the story more than the scars it lights a fire in us, and then maybe some part of the world changes. Think about where you could find strength in pain. The easiest way to go about is to answer two questions. The first, what bothers you the most? The second, what are you good at? Your answers are your ammunition.
Live, love, laugh