She’s A Keeper

I stumbled upon this article that lists reasons-really good reasons-to date a perpetually single girl. Since I’m a writer fond of supporting other writers, give it a read. I’m not a fan of the word ‘perpetually’ but constantly doesn’t seem much nicer when it comes to describing singleness. Let’s just say usually…reasons to date the woman who’s usually single.

The misconception these days about women who have yet to link up with a male counterpart is that they’re not good enough, or they won’t be until they land a man, or they’re destined to die alone with the exception of too many cats. What the hell is that about? No one even likes cats, at least no one awesome does. What I’m saying is the whole spinster stigma is severely overrated. True, there are girls out there who make marriage their greatest goal the ones that don’t know how to function alone and are so painfully needy they’ll settle for whoever calls them pretty, but then there’s this whole other type of single. This rare breed, a sort of endangered species of badass chick that I personally pray never goes extinct. The type of single woman who’s almost always single because that’s how she wants it to be. Here’s why the women who opt for singleness more often than not are the ones worthy of pursuing all the way to the altar.

1) No crazy exes

The usually single woman doesn’t have a long list of men that she teased, took to bed, and then trampled on or got trampled by. Nothing about her says tramp. Her selective nature when it comes to suitors is not stuck up; those standards are what helped her avoid a bunch of emotional baggage. Getting a girl like this means stability from the get-go and that’s exactly what she is looking for herself.

2) She doesn’t settle

Independence is a strong suit with the women who are usually single. They respect themselves too much to snuggle up with a rando just so they don’t have to sleep alone.

3) Don’t expect her to get attached

It’s not that she has trust issues nor is it because she has enough walls built up to create an endless maze. Head-over-heels won’t happen fast because she’s been carefully guarding her heart long before anyone else fell in love with the comforting way it beats.

4) She doesn’t cling

Women who own their single season are great at making plans for one. In fact, they love it because they love themselves; and they love themselves because they’ve spent enough time looking in the mirror to appreciate what’s there. She doesn’t need to be included in the Friday to Sunday shenanigans because she already has plans of her own.

5) She respects boundaries

Don’t want to talk? Just tell her, she gets it, seriously. Not every little thing needs to be brought up in conversation; boundaries exist for a reason, that’s why she maintains her own.

6) She values time

As in your time, her time, and together time. The best couples are not the ones who are constantly co-dependent but the ones who are mutually independent. A usually single woman, knows herself and loves herself so if she chooses to get coupled up she does so not out of necessity, but out of the desire to become an even better, stronger someone who’s honored to be connected with someone just as fierce.

Are there drawbacks? Of course, realizing how awesome you are in your single state of life can be addicting. Seriously. Marry Me Later explains it well. Putting in the effort to love yourself first can leave a lady a little to reluctant to give up doing what she wants, whenever she wants for a handsome face and some good late night company. Women who pick singleness truly do want love as much as any other but they have a hard time showing it. They’ve put honest effort into loving what God created them to be so it’s easy to doubt a man will be able to return that sincerity. Availability is a difficult illustration for someone who is so used to doing it on their own which is why mixed signals happen due to the difficulty in deciding how much to invest in a person of interest. Time is key for females like this, if they give that away odds are they’re attracted and they want to see if that attraction is returned. This type of rare woman is by no means afraid to make the first move but don’t expect her to make them all.